I sometimes pause to read flowery little memes that people share. Happy words dancing across a blurred background. Quotes or poems or fancy phrases.
And I think, oh please. Give me a break!
When life gets crappy I need something I can grip with tight knuckles. I need roots and dirt. Hearty promises that get me through the morning, and then the afternoon.
I was crying my way through a box of tissues during a solitary moment, feeling completely abandoned. And I asked God, do you even know what this feels like? My thoughts jumped to the Garden of Gethsemane when Jesus asked his friends to pray with him. But they kept falling asleep. He needed them to stand with him, to help hold him up, to comfort him with their presence. And they didn’t get it. They were too tired.
They abandoned him.
(By the way, why did Jesus pick a garden to spend his final free hours in? You know what I think? Because it soothed his soul. During a time of deepest anguish, he surrounded himself with beauty and order and green and flowers.)
So when he tells me that he “will be with me,” that he “will never leave me nor forsake me,” I know he gets it. It’s like he’s saying I know what it feels like to be abandoned, and I’m promising you that I will not do that to you.
Oh what a comfort!
That promise is not just a flower in a vase; it has the roots and dirt still clinging to it.