Am I allowed to laugh?
Peals of laughter ring out from the living room where my sister sits, phone to her ear. Spontaneous, carefree, light-hearted laughter.
I want to laugh like that.
I want those moments of break from the heaviness that’s been my companion these many weeks. I want to give my heart a chance to relax, my face a new shape, my shoulders a lightening of their load.
Crying comes easy now. I hugged my kids goodbye after last night’s birthday party and drove away from my home, my used to be home. And the tears overflowed. This part of my life is not easy. This part really sucks. And crying is okay, when the pain gets too heavy to hold.
But I laugh sometimes.
And it’s okay.